If you have spent any time out in the wilds of dating, you already know that rejection can be a very large part of finding and attracting love.
Then again, life is full of rejection is it not?
Rejection from jobs.
Rejections from universities.
Rejections from publishers.
Rejections from credit card companies.
Rejections from bosses for promotions.
Hell, even our own bank account can offer a big old DECLINED when we were just about to brave it up for that pair of leather pants, we never thought we could rock, until just now!
Brene Brown, whom I love to bits, states in the TedTalk, that when other people dare greatly to be seen, get rejected, fail and get back up… we call it courage. In fact, Ted Talks is like the failure club. Almost every person who gets on that stage tells us their own stories of rejection and failure.
So why are we so filled with SHAME instead of COURAGE when it comes to rejection in our dating life?
Why are we so focused on those who would not and could not SEE US and LOVE US, that we often give up, take breaks and find it soul destroying in the arena of love?
Building up some serious resilience to rejection is crucial if we are to triumph!
I have some of my tops tips (and some of my own personal memes for you to keep close) to help build up your resilience to rejection, so when that date foes badly, when they never call, or ghost you mid message.. my darling, you can rise strong each and every time!
Rejection is a blessing, in disguise;
Be philosophical about it – now you are free to find someone who adores you, admires your loveliness and brings out the best in you. This is not YOUR loss. You are still offering an incredible gift, YOU. Beautiful, caring, smart, sassy, funny, incredible YOU. Grab on to the gratitude that your gift was not wasted on someone who could not or would not appreciate it!
Hit that NEXXXT button, babes!
Thanks for rejecting me;
Consider all the reasons they were wrong for you. This helps to move on emotionally.
Write a list if it helps.
Even if that list is simply; IF they can’t have the human decency or honesty to communicate they’re not interested, (AKA ghosting!) then they’re NOT someone you want to be in a relationship with, anyways!
Sometimes we have to spend a whole lot of time, energy and thought filtering out the wrong ones.. Thankfully, they often do it for us!! YASSS!
LIVE AND LEARN;
Sometimes we receive constructive criticism and advice which can be used to improve upon ourselves. It doesn’t mean we’re defective but it’s always a good practice to live and learn
If you have an amicable relationship with the person who rejected you, ask them why! I strongly advise either this be a person you were friends with before the dating OR someone who offered the rejection in an adult and kind manner.
This one requires some bravery, I know you got!
It’s too easy, to let life smack us around a bit.
That is, until we realize, this is OUR LIFE. And though it has many things in it that we cannot control, we always have full power over what happens next.
How we respond. To the situation, the person, place or thing… even how we respond to our feelings, is within our power.
We can love it back or hate every minute of it. We can focus on all things we have not, or on what we do have. What we have to lose OR what we have to gain.
We can live in the solution. Or stay surrendered to the suffering.
Every minute, of every day. The choice is ours.
Today. In this minute. I CHOOSE LOVE. I CHOOSE RISING STRONG. I CHOOSE BEING SEEN AND HEARD!